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The Mango Massacre of 2012

I have this bizarre fear of cutting up mangos.  I love mangos.  Especially in sushi rolls.  I have a heavenly savory mango chicken dish that I love to make, but when it comes time to add the mangos I freak and run to the pantry to open a can.  Which works, but somehow I always feel like I’ve been bogus or fraudulent with my cooking when I do this. I know it’s completely unjustified and kooky, but that’s just how I feel…..so there.

I was faced head on with my fear when I saw mangos on sale last week at the grocery store, so much cheaper than buying the canned version.  I had a black out right there in the produce section and when I returned home I had a two mangos in my bag.  Luckily they were quite hard.  This gave me time to get comfortable with them, to ease into the murderous situation….of removing the fruit of a mango cleanly from it’s pit.

This how it went down.

Murder Scene:

1. Can, mango, can, mango {insert Psycho music} can, mango….Eyes bugging out of head, ears ringing.  Craziness ensues and I give in and haul out my peeler and sharp knife.

2. I slowly remove the mangos skin..so far not too painless.

3. Then you see the final crime scene, it’s been tidied up a bit.  I’ve become good and covering up my murderous kitchen crime scenes.

4. Proof: chop, hack, whack, cut.  OOOweeeech. That is an oooglee site.  I’m sorry you had to see it.  “Please forgive me father for I know not what I do in the kitchen with the mangos.”

Horrifiying I know.

My eyes stop bugging, my ears stop ringing and the voice of reason speaks softly in my ear.  Google Search my child, google search.  Ah, yes!  Why have I not google searched how to cut a mango years ago?  Why?! Well because I’m a bonefide numbskull that’s why!!!!

Of course Elise Bauer of Simply Recipes has a wonderful demonstration on her site of how to properly cut a mango.  Of course…of course she does.  Have I also told you I am a bit bass ackward at times, or have you figured that one out on your own?!

Let us wipe the slate clean and start anew!

Because of mangoes firm but slippery texture, this makes them a challenge to cut.  You want your mangos to be firm and not mushy, when you squeeze them you want your fingers to barely give into the fruit.  The mango has a flat long pit in it’s center that you want to cut around.

1. Stand the mango upright on it’s stem, place a large sharp knife just to the left of center and slice downward, cutting one half of the mango off, do the same on the other side, leaving you with 3 pieces. Two sides and the center pit.

2. Now take each side and score it crossways. Don’t cut all the way through the skin.  Isn’t that purdy?

 

3. Pop the mango halves up, see how easy it is to slice the pieces right off into your bowl.

4. You may even be able to peel them right off the skin.

Phew!  This way is so much easier and cleaner and faster and loverlyer.  I did it!  I cured my fear of mangos.

I will re-share the recipe for Curry Mango Chicken with you soon.  If you can’t wait you can go to my ancient post from StrawberryCake here. 

Next artichokes….Bom bum buuuummm {insert creepy phantom of the opera music}

 

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5 Comments

  1. Thanks for the great post. I never knew how to cut a mango. Mine look pretty much like your massacre scene above. Plus you gave me a big smile!

  2. Mangoes are a fruit I buy already sliced in the produce section of my market. It is so much more enjoyable that way!! If I need more mango than that than I would buy it in bulk at Sam’s Club. In the past I have tried to cut mangoes myself and it is definately worth the added cost of buying it already done for me.
    Have a beautiful weekend!!

    1. I hear ya sistah! I still adore my canned mangos, but am happy to say if I had to do a quick fire challenge on mango cutting I could probably handle it! : ) Have a great weekend.

  3. Oh, I know just how you feel! 18 years of South Florida living with an abundance of free mangoes available to me and I always felt like there was a lot of mango left on the cutting board at the end of the slicing! Good job… I do love me some good mango, yummy!